The Profound Influence of Identity on Behavior and Goal - Setting

Early Influences and the Evolution of Identity

During my elementary school years, my father would rouse my elder brother and me several days a week to engage in karate practice and weight - lifting sessions in the basement. Although initiating an eight - year - old into weight - lifting might not be a generally advisable practice, these experiences left an indelible mark on me. I vividly recall my father proudly boasting to other adults about my lifting capabilities. This act of boasting instilled a sense of pride within me, bolstering my confidence and shaping an identity that I was eager to uphold.

This early formation of a "strong dude" identity has significantly influenced my life trajectory. In junior high, I ventured into football, a sport where physical strength is paramount. Despite being among the stronger members of the team, I was driven to elevate my performance. I adhered to a consistent training regimen that I have maintained to this day.

Each successive identity seemed to spawn the next. Initially, I was recognized as the strong individual. Subsequently, I evolved into the dedicated exerciser. In high school, with the aim of excelling in football, I became serious about breaking lifting records. By the time I reached college, having shed the "football player" label, I intensified my focus on enhancing my strength and physique, aspiring to be the most physically imposing presence in every setting. This aspiration led me to delve into workout programs and peruse fitness magazines. Through interactions at the gym, I was introduced to diverse training methods and dietary practices, expanding my horizons beyond the traditional "meathead" approach.

Upon embarking on a coaching career, I realized that my knowledge of strength and conditioning principles surpassed that of many of my peers. This realization solidified my identity as the "expert trainer," prompting me to pursue certifications such as the CSCS and others. These certifications, in turn, opened doors to opportunities like contributing to Breaking Muscle, as well as numerous contacts, books, and experiences that have nurtured my commitment to fitness and healthy living.

The Role of Identity in Facilitating Consistent Behavior

The cultivation of an identity as a "strong dude" over nearly two decades has been the driving force behind my unwavering commitment to consistent training. To maintain a regular workout routine, I did not rely on contriving a profound "why" or meticulously documenting my goals. Instead, these behaviors organically became an integral part of my self - identity.

Tapping into the power of identity is, indeed, the linchpin for establishing consistent behavior across all aspects of life.

When Identity Hinders Goals

However, there are instances where one's identity can impede the pursuit of goals. For example, towards the end of my college years, I adopted the mindset of a person who indulged in nightly alcohol consumption after work, a behavior prevalent among my friends and adult role models at the time. Nevertheless, consuming three IPAs nightly is hardly conducive to optimal health or performance. Eventually, this "drinker" identity clashed with my core value of health, compelling me to reevaluate and transform my self - identity.

Most individuals approach fitness and behavior change mechanistically, as if they were robots following a pre - scripted routine. They aspire to remain the same person while achieving enhanced strength or a slimmer physique. Consequently, they resolve to commence exercise, improve their diet, or engage in other behaviors they believe will lead them to their goals. While this approach is not inherently flawed, it increases the likelihood of failure when one focuses solely on processes and outcomes without considering their true self and the behaviors necessary for long - term sustainability.

Conversely, success is more attainable when one approaches goals as opportunities to evolve into an improved version of themselves, integrating new aspects into their identity.

Reframing Identity: A Path to Lasting Change

James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, highlights a significant distinction in the language used by individuals attempting to quit smoking. Those who say, "No thanks. I'm trying to quit," are less likely to succeed compared to those who assert, "No thanks. I don't smoke." However, this is not merely a matter of wishful thinking. Genuine belief in change is essential, and this belief is cultivated gradually by envisioning oneself as a different kind of person.

To shift our beliefs about ourselves and our identity, we must focus on emulating the behaviors of those who embody the qualities we desire. As Clear posits, "Your identity emerges out of your habits. You are not born with preset beliefs. Every belief, including those about yourself, is learned and conditioned through experience. More precisely, your habits are how you embody your identity. When you make your bed each day, you embody the identity of an organized person. When you write each day, you embody the identity of a creative person. When you train each day, you embody the identity of an athletic person."

We have all experienced this phenomenon. In high school, I identified as an athlete. After achieving a 4.0 GPA in my first semester of college, I began to perceive myself as intelligent and actively worked to live up to that self - image. At 25, when I sought to overcome anxiety for the sake of my fiancée, I started meditating daily and, in the process, became a meditator. This last example is particularly instructive. I had dabbled in meditation previously but was not fully committed to lifestyle change. Only when I made a resolute, no - excuses commitment to daily meditation did I begin to reap its benefits.

To effect lasting behavioral change, one should ask themselves, "What kind of person acts this way?"

The Power of a Like - Minded Community

This question underscores the significance of embracing a community where the desired behaviors are the norm. By immersing oneself in such a community, one can observe the belief patterns and habits of individuals who have already adopted these behaviors. These role models illuminate a multitude of more effective paths. The more time one spends among them, the more likely they are to adopt these habits. This is exemplified by the CrossFit community, which rapidly fosters individuals who are well - versed in their Fran times, favor a Paleo - inspired diet, and engage in mobility workouts between regular workouts.

However, there are numerous other positive communities to join beyond CrossFit. For instance, Justin Lind and my IHD Seekers Membership aim to effect positive behavior change on a global scale.

According to Clear, every action is a vote for the kind of person one wishes to become. To achieve health, not every action in life need directly contribute to this goal; rather, the aim is for an increasing number of actions to do so over time. Thus, instead of fixating on the specific outcome or behavior one wishes to adopt, it is more prudent to begin by asking, "What kind of person would behave in the way I desire?"

This does not necessarily imply conforming to a group identity like that of CrossFitters. One can identify successful individual identities, such as toughness, reliability, or tenacity, and choose to embody them.

The author Michael Lewis eloquently expounded on this concept during an episode of Tim Ferriss's podcast: "As I've gotten older… I could not help but notice the effect on people of the stories they told about themselves. If you listen to people… you'll find patterns in the way they talk about themselves. There's the kind of person who is always the victim in any story that they tell. Always on the receiving end of some injustice. There's the person who's always kind of the hero of every story they tell. There's the smart person; they delivered the clever put - down there. There are many versions of this, and you've got to be very careful about how you tell these stories because it starts to become you. You are—in the way you craft your narrative—crafting your character. And so I did at some point decide, 'I am going to adopt… as my narrative, that I'm the happiest person anybody knows.' And it is amazing how happy - inducing it is."

This narrative often hinges on a reframe. One already has an identity that they hold dear. One must then consider:

• How do your goals align with that identity?

• In other words, how can you make failing to follow through a threat to your identity?

For example, if you value your identity as a good father or mother, reframing this value is one of the most significant gifts you can bestow upon your children by providing a healthy model. If you lead an active, healthy life, your children are more likely to do the same. From this perspective, the chaos of parenting can no longer serve as an excuse for neglecting your health. Committing to better nutrition and regular exercise is the only way to fulfill your aspirations of being the ideal parent. This, indeed, is the true source of motivation.